Taking stock

Editor's note: Donna M. Romeo is founding principal of Romeo Anthropological Consulting LLC. Laurie Tema-Lyn is founder of research firm Practical Imagination Enterprises. 

While catching up with each other on a Zoom call during the start of the COVID-19 pandemic, the two of us got to talking about the concept of dinner. We talked about how the crisis was affecting us personally and how the notion of dinner and all its associated parts – grocery shopping, meal planning, cooking and eating – was in many ways being challenged. 

Wondering how our own experiences compared to those of others, we decided to reach out to a diverse group of people of different ages, backgrounds, households and locales. (See methodology box.)

With curiosity and open minds, we explored “dinner in the age of COVID-19.” We wanted to understand whether the notion of dinner itself was changing and some of the attitudes, values and behaviors around dinner planning, shopping, preparation, sanitation practices and food storage. We also wanted to explore what lessons might be gained from this crisis. 

We discovered key themes that cut across differences in age, life stage, living arrangement, region and socioeconomic status. 

Dinner in the age of COVID-19 is characterized as a time of taking stock – an act that is expressed and experienced physically, socially, emotionally and spiritually.

Physically: How are people accumulating food and other material items to stay safe and well-fed during the crisis? What is the experience of trying to obtain these items? 

Socially: How are people checking-in, safeguarding and providing for families and loved ones during this time? How are they reacting to neighbors and community?

Emotionally: How are people feeling? How are they coping with stress and anxiety? Is it possible to find happiness and joy during COVID-19?

Spiritually: How are people (re)assessing their lives? What’s most meaningful and important? What might we learn and gain from this crisis? 

Made an inventory 

When the COVID-19 crisis began, people made an inventory of items they had on hand in the pantry, refrigerator and freezer. Many wanted to get to a store before panic and shutdowns began to purchase staples and critical items that could last for several weeks. They planned to load up on toilet paper, cleaning products, canned foods, dry goods and frozen foods.

To limit personal exposure to the virus, respondents grocery-shop less frequently. Gone are the days of shopping every day or two for a few items. The exception: city dwellers who shop more often because they walk to the store and carry their packages or have smaller kitchens with limited food storage space. 

No matter the frequency, when people go to the store in person, they are focused on their mission. They come adorned with a face mask, armed with shopping list and at least a general idea of meals they will prepare for the next week or two. They want to spend as little time as possible inside the store and prefer shopping close to home at a familiar place in which they feel safer because they know the layout and location of products, meaning there is less time wasted searching for groceries. They avoid going to multiple stores to find deals or to find favorite items. 

Some participants who felt more at risk going to a grocery store turned to online shopping or delivery services. Unfortunately, several were alarmed by their inability to get delivery within a reasonable timeframe. Logging onto sites such as Instacart at different days or times (including 3 a.m.!) didn’t always help. One mom relayed her panic when told she had to wait five days for a grocery delivery slot. Others just gave up.

Everyone makes trade-offs

No matter what their approach to stocking up, everyone makes trade-offs due to product shortages. This was a major problem at the onset of the pandemic when distribution channels were disrupted. It’s less so now, as more products are back on store shelves. 

A New York City Millennial spoke of “panic attacks” seeing empty shelves. A retired Chattanooga police officer noted “random shortages,” which she is still experiencing five months into the pandemic. She doesn’t know what to expect in the large chain store she goes to and dislikes substituting brand-name favorites for store brands. 

While distribution across the country is certainly better now, there are still gaps. People are still making do at times. When desired items reappear on store shelves, they stock up, just in case stores run out later.

Most participants said these substitutes didn’t disappoint and might even become part of their “new normal.” In a post-COVID-19 world, food manufacturers will have to work hard to prove that name brands are worth seeking out.

Keep themselves safe

Many respondents had unique stories to tell about elaborate steps taken to keep their homes, families and themselves safe after going to the store. A woman described her process as “just short of hazmat suits.” People told us about prodigious use of hand sanitizers, bleach or wipes, followed by rigorous handwashing. Grocery bags were placed in the garage, in the foyer or on the floor vs. on the kitchen counter. Some described their process of wiping down each item as neurotic but argued that it’s better to be safe than sorry.

Apartment and condo dwellers had to jump through additional hoops to stay safe after shopping. One apartment-dwelling young woman in the Washington, D.C., area refused to take the shared elevator. She preferred carrying bags of groceries up four flights of stairs.

Over time, some of these sanitation routines are becoming relaxed. A young man living with older parents who have underlying health conditions described their initial one- to two-hour sanitizing ritual every time they went shopping. Now that the family is aware that transmission of COVID-19 is primarily airborne, they’ve simplified their elaborate process to just putting food items away and thoroughly washing their hands afterward. 

Did little planning

When it came to meal planning, our participants fell into two camps: those who thoroughly planned, mapping out several meals for the week, and those who were more spontaneous and did little planning. It seems stereotypical: the women were the planners and primary cooks – with notable exceptions of two households with men at the helm in the kitchen. Some men and older children help as sous-chefs or prepare breakfast or lunch. In warmer weather, men are likely to be grill masters for the household. 

Since COVID-19, even those who previously shunned planning have modified their ways. They make shopping lists and create a general meal plan guided by the principle of having enough proteins, pantry staples and perishables on hand to quickly pull together several meals during the week. Those with extra freezers keep them well-stocked. 

Everyone uses curbside pickup or delivery of restaurant meals at least occasionally. The youngest study participants are more frequent users, partly to take a break from the routine (in some cases, boredom) of cooking with the added benefit of supporting local businesses. When the crisis began, those who enjoyed cooking continued to do so at a higher frequency; those who relied mostly on restaurants for meals and socializing were the most distraught by the shutdown. 

The young men and women we interviewed had less cooking experience and few skills to start with but the desire to learn. They turn to mom or the web to find recipes and cooking videos. 

Carbs, candy and wine

One of our incoming assumptions was that people would turn to comfort foods during the pandemic. That was borne out. Some reported they ate more carbs, binged on candy, drank more wine. When they could find flour or yeast, they baked more. Banana bread was often cited as a popular comfort food. 

As the COVID-19 crisis endures, reliance on comfort foods is giving way to more normative eating patterns. A Texas woman explained, “It was more of a time for comfort foods and alcohol. I baked like crazy! Banana bread, carrot cake. I finally said, ‘This is unhealthy!’”

The popularity of homemade banana bread also reflects the desire to curtail food waste. Fewer shopping trips means that people must conserve what they have. Some talked of preparing scavenger meals using leftovers and putting random food items together to make a meal based on what they had on hand.

The value of social relationships

The pandemic has served as a tremendous reminder of the core cultural value of social relationships. This is evident in the importance placed on the sharing of meals with others.

People who live and quarantine together are grateful that their COVID-19 social pod has enabled them to weather the crisis safely as a shared experience.

A respondent described her extended social pod as comprised of three family households who eat most meals together, rotating between the three homes. Another social pod was composed of two parents, their adult son and another adult son and his wife who live nearby. 

As restrictions have lifted, some people are including trusted friends in their circle of trust. A mom in Los Angeles and another in Boston have each weighed the risks and decided to integrate another family into their pod for playtimes, lunches, picnics and, importantly, to provide social interaction for their young children.

Frequent checking-in with family and friends, especially those living at a distance, has become an essential part of routines with video chat platforms such as Zoom and Skype considered lifesavers. 

Several talked about unexpected joys in renewing family and friend communications and even rekindling lost connections via video chat. These calls with loved ones are sometimes lubricated with the virtual sharing of snacks, dinners and happy-hours over Zoom. One young man noted: “The technology has been integrated into our celebrations.”

Empathy and mistrust

We heard two opposing themes about how respondents perceive the world outside their family or social unit. They express sadness and empathy towards those deemed less fortunate – those who lost jobs, have fewer financial resources – and they’re concerned about small business owners who are struggling. But they also mistrust their larger community. A Dallas woman relayed her uncomfortable story: At the first neighborhood gathering during the pandemic, she was dismayed by a complete lack of social distancing. As people tried to come to her house without masks, she said, “I’m so happy to see you. Now please leave!” She feared becoming part of a supercell of contagion. 

When discussing dining at restaurants, we found younger people more willing to dine al fresco and a few open to dining inside. Those who braved a restaurant excursion said it was “weird” or too stressful to be worth it. A Chicago couple, finding themselves seated at a table on a noisy street corner, were even more upset to smell smoke from another diner. “If I can smell the cigarette smoke,” one of them said, “doesn’t that mean the virus could travel this far?”

A few respondents avoided takeout altogether for fear that food could be contaminated. One even mitigates risk by microwaving takeout meals before placing them on the table to eat. 

We heard many comments about mistrusting others. How can you trust someone else if you don’t know their hygiene practices? Do they wash their hands regularly? Who do they party with? Are they maintaining mask-wearing and social distancing while out in public? As one woman from San Antonio explained, “I can’t recall the last time I met someone new. If I don’t have to, why would I? I stick with people I know and trust.”

Anxiety-inducing

COVID-19 has undoubtedly had an impact on emotional health. The initial months during lockdown were the most stressful, depressing and anxiety-inducing period. Respondents felt threats to personal safety and loss of control. As it relates to food, it was a frantic period of stockpiling, panic shopping, dealing with out-of-stocks, difficulties getting food delivery time slots and comfort-food bingeing. 

Beyond food, we heard comments about missing the pre-COVID-19 daily routines: going out to work, sending children off to school and having a weekend. There is a sense of unmooring. Weekdays and weekends bleed into each other. A Los Angeles woman reports, “feeling the strain of Groundhog Day, where every day is the same, like this will never end.” 

These early, anxiety-driven days were followed by adjusting and adapting to a new normal. People fell into new routines and, without commute time, many began to experience more time for sleep, cooking and relaxation. 

This adjustment period has continued, with people somewhat relaxing their grocery shopping and sanitation routines as well as social distancing standards, allowing more people into their sphere of social interaction. 

Worth noting is that the way COVID-19 is experienced emotionally differs by location and type of dwelling in which a person lives. In densely packed urban environments, people have greater worries about getting the virus. The enclosed space of a small apartment can feel claustrophobic, which in turn stresses relationships. 

Many urban dwellers lack patios or backyards, and apartments or condos have closed down pools, athletic centers and social gathering spaces, making it much more challenging to get outside. 

Not the same

COVID-19 has certainly thrown monkey wrenches into daily life and its short- and long-term planning. People mourn the loss of vacations, sporting events, canceled birthday and graduation celebrations. They create substitutions but they are not the same. People regret not being able to hug and kiss their children, grandchildren and loved ones beyond their immediate households. They chafe at their restricted freedom, feel frustrated that they can’t enjoy simple things in life, like playing soccer or hanging out on the beach with friends. 

Some are worried about financial losses or personal and family health. A few people spoke about panic attacks, anxiety, insomnia and feeling a general sense of malaise. Beyond the circle of friends and family, there are widespread worries about the political landscape and social injustices, causing even larger rifts in society. 

Many have said there’s a persistent “fear factor” always lurking in the background which is physically and mentally exhausting. 

Silver linings 

Even with daily-life disruptions and worries, everyone was quick to identify silver linings in their experience of the pandemic. There were many, specifically related to food, drink and dining. 

Among those in households with partners or children, we heard stories of enjoying more time sitting together at the dinner table, eating, talking, drinking and relaxing without having to rush out to other activities.

Empty nesters told us how much they enjoy spending more time with partners; parents spoke lovingly of lengthy dinnertime conversations with their children; and adult children appreciated the extra time they can spend with their parents. 

There are additional, unanticipated benefits of eating meals at home. Those who used to dine out frequently, have saved money and lost weight. Some were surprised to realize just how little time they spent at home before the pandemic and have rediscovered and reevaluated their homes and gardens. People are investing time and energy in growing vegetable and herb gardens, cleaning, beautifying and improving their homes. 

But amongst the silver linings, there are dark clouds, particularly among families with small children. We heard how challenging it is for parents of school-age and preschool kids. These parents must juggle work-at-home and homeschooling, trying to keep the children content and thriving, while striving to put a decent meal together that everyone will eat. 

These folks need all the resources they can get in terms of grocery delivery services, ready-made meals, menu ideas and quick preparation tricks and recipes. 

Despite concerns and challenges experienced with COVID-19, everyone we spoke with expressed a deep sense of gratitude for all that they have. “I feel blessed,” I’m so grateful,” “I’m so thankful,” “I’m so fortunate” and “This too shall pass” were commonly heard sentiments.

The crisis has given people a chance to reflect on what matters most in life. Family, friends, love, health and financial resources to buy and enjoy food are treasured and no longer taken for granted. As one woman said, “We’ve distilled down what’s most important – family, the quality of life and the beauty of life.”

For many, the process of preparing and eating food has become a more conscious experience, a creative and perhaps spiritual activity. This linkage has deep roots in our culture – from stories of the Last Supper to “breaking bread together.” We heard literal examples of this with participants celebrating religious holiday meals (Easter and Passover) with people across distances, via Zoom video chat. 

Desire for experimentation

Especially at the start of COVID-19, there was a sense of having more time and a desire for experimentation to break the monotony. For some, this meant trying out new hobbies like bike repair or learning new skills like breadmaking. A Dallas respondent had four sourdough starters growing in containers throughout her kitchen. A New Jersey woman who enjoys cooking but never bakes told us: “I took a Zoom challah-making class and was thrilled. Now I’m looking forward to learning how to make gnocchi in another Zoom class.” 

A few experimented with new kitchen gadgets and tools, either newly purchased or found deep in the recesses of the pantry. One Los Angeles resident was happy to tell us about her new InstaPot and how amazing it was for preparing quick meals for her family. Another was excited about his new air fryer and trying his hand at making french fries. 

Others dabbled in new cuisines and recipes. A mother and son who started cooking together recalled the joys of international travel, including prior trips to Japan. During the lockdown, they’ve learned how to make authentic Japanese dinners. 

Some have aimed to inject creativity and even humor into dinnertime routines, including dressing up for dinner or using the good dinnerware. One art director is delighted to have found his inner creative cook. He posts photos of his dinner creations on Facebook to share and inspire others. An apartment dweller delights in making every meal look exquisite. She sets the dining table with linen napkins, and “always uses the Riedel wine glasses even when dining in the media room.” And, a retiree brings humor and fun to dinner by dressing up to fit the theme of the meal. His outfits have included a tuxedo, a leather vest and beer holster and a suave “Godfather” suit.

Wealth of implications 

There are many more learnings from the research and a wealth of implications for the future. We highlight several here.

Restaurant industry. Restaurants will have to invest in rigorous, and visible, sanitary practices to help patrons feel comfortable dining with them. They might offer meal kits in a box to people who want to try to replicate the restaurant experience at home. Since restaurant dining is powerfully intertwined with positive and joyful celebrations (birthdays, anniversaries and graduations), emphasize the celebratory nature of dining out in marketing communications. 

Food industry. This is the time for people to learn or expand upon cooking knowledge, to experiment with global cuisines, new recipes, cooking methods, kitchen tools and gadgets. Provide people with these things in spades and they’ll love you. This particularly holds true for younger, less experienced cooks, who need more help in the kitchen. Make it easy for the cook – easy-to-find recipes, shortcuts, speed scratch-cooking ideas, etc. Break down recipes into individual portions for the solo householder or for households where each person has their own dietary preferences or needs. Food delivery is here to stay, especially if services can be more robust to ensure greater product availability and shorter wait times for delivery. Brand loyalty is not a sure thing; food manufacturers will have to continue to advertise and reassure shoppers of the benefits of buying national and premium brands vs. store brands. 

Technology and design. Video chat platforms such as Zoom are essential; they will endure. There may be opportunities for tie-ins and promotional bundles for the dining-while-video-chatting experience. Develop tools/apps to enhance smartphone food photos styled perfectly for social media.

Advertising. Target two emotional segments – those who embrace the romantic notions and pleasures of cooking and dining at home vs. those who feel shamed or guilty because they can’t do it all. Cooking is another stressor exacerbated by COVID-19. Communicate in ways that acknowledge diversity and aim to destigmatize the overwhelmed or bored cook. 

Social distancing. We expect there will be a long-lasting wariness of strangers. People will prefer to stay within their closer circle of friends and family. Brands that have strong affinities with family, close friends and loved ones will benefit. 

A positive note

Though interviewees poured out their hearts to us as they traced their several months-long experiences during the pandemic, each conversation ended on a positive note. They have grown, have deepened personal relationships, have discovered new personal strengths and creativity and reevaluated what matters most. They are hopeful individuals. As research consultants reflecting on all that we have heard, we feel a greater sense of empathy for all of us adjusting to the new normal and we see many potential business opportunities for our clients. 

Methodology

The authors each conducted hour-long video interviews in July 2020.

• N=14.
• Respondent age range: 23-72.
• Two Hispanics, one Native American.
• Singles, living alone, married or cohabiting with partner.
• Four households with children under age 18. Two households with adult children living with older parents (during COVID-19).
• Regions: Urban — New York City, Chicago, Los Angeles, Boston. Suburban: New Jersey, Troy, N.Y., Chattanooga, Tenn., San Antonio, Texas, McKinney, Texas, and Alexandria, Va. Rural: New Jersey.
• Occupations: financial analyst, creative director, HR manager, voiceover artist, fine artist and printmaker, social worker, master’s student in education, marketer/law firm, policy analyst, Capitol Hill, dental hygienist, retired police officer, retired school teacher, retired electrician.
• Incomes: “starting outs” ($25,000 to $45,000), fixed income, middle class, upper middle class. One was furloughed due to COVID-19 but returned to work; no one lost a job.